My Life

The past year has been very rocky for the kids and I.  But we have learned that others choices do affect us, that it is so very important to be honest in even the small things.  There is such evil out there, the world seems to be upside down... Families that seemed so strong are being but through the refiners fire.  We are promised that if our foundation is built upon Christ heaven and hell can combine against us and we should have nothing to fear.  I don't want to by any means make what others go through seem small.  But at this point in my life I feel like I have been through a lot of this.  There have been countless times that I have been pleading on my knees for the Lord to take away our pain, it would ease a little but then still come back.  But through everything I have been so blessed.  I have five beautiful children, I would go through all of the ugly again just to have them.  I have been blessed to be around family to help lift me, and new friends and old that I haven't heard from have all of a sudden checked to see how I was doing.


Yes the Lord does work miracles, It would take a long time to share al the miracles the Lord has blessed us with.  One that I will always remember though is this Christmas.  I had no desire to celebrate this year, I knew I wouldn't have the money to even come close to what the kids were used to for Christmas.  I just went through the motions for my kids.  Then one night a gentleman from my church came to the door with a gift card and said Merry Christmas from some of the people from the church.  There was a significant amount on the card that I could buy a present for each child.  Then on Christmas eve we got a visit at  four in the afternoon from Santa and his Ninja Elf.  He had a bag full of presents for my kids.  They had the true look of happiness and joy on there faces that I will NEVER forget.  I couldn't stop crying, we were truly so blessed.


I don't know how the stress of this past year has affected my health.  But I do know that my children and I will continue to be blessed.  Everyone has there struggles, these are just mine for now.  I will continue to fight and rise above the consequences of choices that others have made.  In the end I know that I can say I tried my hardest and did my best.  Hopefully my children will one day look back and see their mother not as a victim or a survivor but a hero.